Before we even talk about sabotaging success, I think it's important to define success. Because listen to this - the dictionary defines success as:
- 1.the accomplishment of an aim or purpose.
Do you know what that means? It means WE get to define the aim or purpose. WE DO! Not anybody else in our lives. Isn't that amazing? How many of you can say that you let the expectations of others change the way you show up and evaluate your life? I can raise both hands and both feet.
So, now that we know we get to make the rules, let's take and see if there are ways you may be sabotaging yourself from your own definition of success.
"If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you'll find an excuse."
Sabotage is the gap between intention and action. The gap is the reason why we don't do the thing we intended to. Self-sabotage kills many a plan because we get in our own head or we start looking around at everyone else.
Let's break down 4 ways you may be self-sabotaging and how you can work towards accelerating your life.
1. Lack of Self-Confidence or Self-Doubt
I was listening to a podcast today by Mae Deevy about how a fellow hypnotherapist found hypnotherapy and her guest said she had NO idea self-worth was the core of her outer circumstances and that she finally realized that every situation in her life was a result of a lack of self-worth.
YOU GUYS....that's so huge. How many people are walking around in self-doubt, lacking confidence in who they are? How many people could be sitting on a gold mind of ideas and life changing circumstances but they can't move out from under the lack?
Lack of self-confidence or self-doubt occurs when we compare ourselves to other, we envy others, we let one bad decision or past experience keep us from moving forward in similar situations and ultimately, it's that ego trying to protect you.
So where do you begin? Recognition first. How do we heal? Start by making a list of all of your values. Not values you THINK you should have, but the things and qualities in life you actually value and want to emanate. Check in with yourself daily to see if you are leading by these values and if not, start :)
2. Blame & Anger
These things happen when we are attached to a particular outcome and when that doesn't happen, our ego's most basic reaction is to blame someone else for what did or didn't happen.
I bet you've experienced this or seen it happen before. It seems so easy to blame someone else, doesn't it? It takes ourselves completely out of the equation. But the thing is, no one is automatically entitled to "success", right? If and when we start thinking that we are, that is when blame and anger come in.
How do we pivot? Start thinking about and looking at what you can control in your life. Start taking note of certain situations or people that cause you to become angry. We can control our own situations by taking note and then preparing.
3. Excuses & Procrastination
Indecision is real. So many people simply can not decide. Most of the time it's because they are afraid to disappoint. And that usually comes in the form of an excuse which is the ego's way of making sure people will still like us even though we decide not to follow through with our intended action.
Here's the thing, you can always change your mind later but you've got to pick one thing and go! Man oh man I've seen what can happen when you DO decide and you move forward with that one priority. Imagine if all your energy went towards one thing instead of splitting your energy trying to please others, and yourself, and also trying to decide where to show up???
How to change that? Pick one thing. One thing and go for it. Don't look back, don't wonder if you should have picked the other thing. Give that one thing all of your intention for a good amount of time. Go forward knowing that you always have the option to change your mind down the road.
Fear stems from something in our past or someone modeling it for us. Did you know that when we are born we are born with two fears; the fear of falling and the fear of loud noises. That means every other fear that we have as adults is learned.
You know what else that means? It can be unlearned AND we can choose to be a great model for the next generation.
It starts with identifying the fear. What it is and where it came from. You will likely see that most of your fears are unjustified. Then you can start peeling back the layers, breaking it down.
If you can see yourself in any of these situations and you have the desire to bring your life into balance and experience insane personal growth and fun faster than any other way, then you may want to begin with my signature program so we can work on moving into the Oola Accelerators way of life.
Check it out and see if it sounds like a fit for you. I know what it's like to self-sabotage....it held me down for years. Once I started working towards accelerating my life was I finally able to see and put into practice the exact framework that changed the entire trajectory of my whole life. I want that for you too!